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Feb. 7, 2020

MOTHUSI THABANE

3 min read

Destiny reached

Destiny reached

Professor Calvin Motebang

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Calling a spade a spade is what Professor Calvin Motebang does best. He is popular for his clear-cut definition of what makes a relationship work or fail. His Wednesday programme on a local radio station - Harvest FM - is popular with the young and old alike because of his no-nonsense approach to marital issues and dating. He actually tells things as they are with no holds barred. “You might be in love with your wife, but not compatible. Before you tie the knot you must first find out whether or not you are compatible, because if not, the marriage will not work,” he said. “You see, the problem is not with the institution of marriage or the paper, but with the people. Certain personalities are simply incompatible and people only find out the differences after signing the papers. That is when they find that the marriage is on the rocks, or the country is not moving forward, and they wonder why.”

It’s probably the way he says it that is so shocking. He is loud and clear. He unashamedly identifies and names problems in a relationship and comes up with solutions.

Born in Hlotse, Lisemeng in the Leribe district 65 years ago, Prof Motebang is the fifth child of Motšoene Motebang who was a pharmacist and ’Mamohlomi. He attended Hlotse Primary and Molumong Primary Schools in his maternal home, Mokhotlong, after which he went to Hlotse High School. He later joined the Assemblies Bible College (ABC) in 1977 while attending evening classes at LIFE High School. He was sponsored by the Save the Children Fund.

Following a one-year stint at the Leprosy Hospital as a paramedic, he was invited by the Swiss Pentecostal Mission at Mount Tabor to work as an interpreter and English teacher to Swiss Pentecostal Missionaries.

In 1980 he was invited as a tutor to train pastors.

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“Alongside that I was elected both the General Treasurer of Assemblies Church and later I was elected the General Superintendant of the college. Alongside those responsibilities I enrolled with the then ICI University in Brussels where I obtained a degree in Counselling and Family Therapy in 1980. It was then that I became deeply involved in family therapy using the theological psychosocial model for counselling and family wellness,” he says.

Never at ease, Prof Motebang continued to climb the academic ladder and studied the theological psychosocial model of counselling for family wellness with Liberty and Emerge Universities among others, by correspondence. But the turning point of his career came in 2003 when he was forced to resign from the ABC after he divorced his wife.

“I resigned from ABC and became a full time marriage therapist and counsellor and started Effective Counselling Services where alongside the counselling ministry, I pursued and delivered my exercises in counselling and mentoring young people who wanted to study and pursue counseling at a higher level,” he notes.

A prolific writer, who has also produced DVDs and CDs on marriage and relationships, his work was recognised by the International Methodist University in the U.K. which awarded him the Doctor of Ministry degree in 2004, while the Interdenominational Theological Center in Atlanta Georgia, awarded him a Doctorate in 2011 and elected him to its Board of Directors.

“They also awarded me a Professorship,” he said.

Keeping up with the new trend in publishing, he has books on Amazon Kindle. His works include The Complexity of Our Relationships and The Paradox of Love (2012) and The Schematic Model of Human Behaviour (2012).

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